Archive for March, 2012

I grew up in Everquest — the original one.  It was my first MMoRPG.  Times were tough, credit was “meh”, and I played with prepaid cards (like so many do) because I had to.  One day, Sony in its wisdom decided to stop selling Everquest cards in Canada.  And everything I’d worked for was for naught.  I left Everquest with much sadness.  In all truth and honesty, I never found another community like it anywhere.   I never found another game that could completely fill the hole left by EQ.  I never did.  Ever.

Time passed, and I jumped from game to game looking for something that would fulfill my gaming need.  I don’t remember them all.  I think City of Heroes was first.  Then Guild Wars.  Then Everquest II (what a complete and total disappointment).  Then a long run in World of Warcraft.  And recently when Star Trek Online went free-to-play I jumped into that.  And I think STO is  probably my second favourite game ever, and the closest to taking Everquest’s title.

So when I heard that Everquest had gone free-to-play, my heart literally leaped for joy and I downloaded the client immediately.  The server I used to play on doesn’t even exist anymore so I didn’t even try to get my old account back.  I think it was hacked anyway.  I started over and re-created the original Nenianae.  The character that “started it all” so many years ago.

BUT… not only could I not select the wood elf race as a free player, I couldn’t select the ranger class either.  Do you really think I’m going to fork over a credit card number that soon after starting a new game?  Of course not.  I made her a human warrior.  Except for size, I think she looked almost identical.

And I started to play.

It was immediately apparent to me that I had not played EQ in a long time.  I thought it would come back to me quickly but I found myself struggling to remember hotkeys, and dealing with interface panels I’d never seen before.  Plus I was in some sort of “global starter zone” that was completely unfamiliar to me.  I had no interest in it.  I planned a jailbreak.

I found a knowledgeable gnome who agreed to lead me to the Plane of Knowledge.  From there I figured I could find my way to a more familiar area to quest.  And I have to admit, my heart was racing a little bit at this point at the thought of being re-united with the tree city of Upper Faydark again.  I spent so much time there.  Even as a higher-level player.  Because higher levels used to hang out in starter zones and help.  That’s the kind of community we had in EQ.  I knew that zone like the back of my hand.  My mind was racing too, remembering all the connections from Upper Faydark, and figuring out what places I could go (at my ridiculously low level) without getting killed.

The gnome and I turned a corner and I saw a book on a pedestal and I started to get really excited.  I knew where the book connected me to.  I clicked the book and was back in the Plane of Knowledge — the central hub to get pretty much anywhere in EQ.  It was like a homecoming of sorts.

I ran to the other side of the POK.  I was almost as excited as if I’d won the lottery.  I found the Kelethin stone, and clicked it and voila… I was surrounded by oh-so-familiar trees, and the lifts on the ground that took you up to the tree city.

So I got on the lift and went up.  And proceeded to attempt to conduct a transaction with one of the vendors only for it to dawn on me — I wasn’t a wood elf — so she wouldn’t do business with me.  I was pretty bummed.  But at the same time I was at least in a familiar environment so I went and killed things in an attempt to level and maybe get some decent stuff.

Then I died.  And — you guessed it — I forgot to talk to the soulbinder.  And it teleported me all the way back to where I started.

By which time I’d lost interest in making the trip again.

So long Everquest.  I’ll really miss you.


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No folks, my blog didn’t get hacked.

My spouse and I took a long vacation from WoW.  We were both pretty burnt out.  For Valentines Day, my beautiful stunning wife bought us two prepaid cards.  Now we just need to get a few characters in good level-alignment so we can actually use the gift to play together.  We had some fun today playing her priest with my paladin.

But I digress.

A few weeks ago, I took a massive crap.  In non-WoW vernacular, it was the “spinal tap” poop.  I felt like I was giving birth to triplets.  True story.  It was so excruciating, in a moment of Alliance-weakness, I yelled/groaned “FOR THE HORDE!!” (in my best gruff orc voice) as I made one last desperate push to drop the kids at the pool.  And thus, the joke was born.

My wife is having somewhat of a rough couple of months and after a moment of frustration, she disappeared into the bathroom to take a relaxing bath.  It’s a girl thing.  I totally don’t understand. I don’t pretend to.  It only makes me look like a huge schmuck.  Oh wait.  I am.  But I digress.

She emerged from the bathroom looking refreshed, renewed, and somewhat radiant.  As she proceeded to log into the game, she announced to me that she’d had no fewer than three craps while she was in there.  Information I had not solicited, but I demonstrated interest because that’s the kind of renaissance man I am.  “How many of them were ‘For The Horde’ craps?”, I asked.

“All of them, if I was grinding in a water zone.”

I’m so getting WoW wood right now.  And she’s ALL mine, boys.  She’s ALL mine.

Addendum:  I just read the article to her, and we got into an ensuing conversation about what other WoW characters could be used as poop metaphors.  I suggested “The Fel Reaver Dump”.  She turned, cringed, and said “Ouch that would hurt with all those pinchy things…”  Oh baby.  The lovin is gonna be hot tonight.

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